Demensions

This is me, or other me...? the me inside my head...? the better me...? I don't know, but just for your understanding (and mine), she is me but she isn't me. She has all of my memories yet she had many of her own. She makes a lot of friends, while I did not. She make her own choices based on my own mistakes and stride on proud.

At least that what she is, to me. I think. Her choices had altered the world around us. Changing ever so slightly in her own world. Growing more and more opened as I closed myself from it. She is the better one, the one I could only imagine being - technically speaking, she is what I imagined her to be.

She is Afiqah Mahat. World One.

The second me... the ghost at the back, the one who make the worst of choices at the worst of time. She did what we, I never thought she would do. Suicide. She is driven by her, our emotions and took a leap of life. Literally. This is probably due to our shared depression and anxiety had caused this. She is me, afterall. She is eager to help others, but in her world, no one had the same enthusiasm towards her. She let the negative thoughts consumed her whole and driven her into self-destruction.

Her and I had one think in common. We both loved to draw. But that's it. While I preferred to draw simple characters, she would draw much more... realistics... gore arts. They were quite depressing. Too bad no one cared enough to look at it and figured out her problems, before its too late.

She was Afiqah Mahat. World Two.

Both are me. But not me. Both have made their choices and lived with the consequences. One is happily with her loved ones, the other is wilting away from the love she craved. While I, the one in between, still learning and making mistakes.

I am Afiqah Mahat. Reality.